My Millennium Part 14

Chapter 31

Carol

I’ve been feeling a little better recently. Scott hasn’t been bad, still hard to deal with but I’ll take that over the violence. Patrick has been nice too. He just provides a distraction for a moment. I really appreciated everything he was doing.

Scott was with me now. He was in a somewhat decent mood. I was actually going to break up with him, I wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Josh wasn’t here so it was okay.

“Scott.” I said.

He looked at me. His brown eyes were cold, or maybe that’s the only way I could see him.

“I really don’t want to be with you. You’ll still have the other one. I just can’t do this anymore.” I said, slowly. I wasn’t very confident.

His face didn’t change one bit.

“Why? So you can go and run into Patrick’s arms again?” Scott said bitterly.

“Patrick is my friend. I’m not going to just run into arms.” I said.

“Good. He doesn’t care for you, you know that right?” He said, calmly.

Scott didn’t know all he was doing for me. He didn’t know the truth.

“I mean Carol; you are so hard to deal with. You’re lucky to have me, because I love you. You’re so hard to please.” He said.

I know that Patrick maybe didn’t want to be with me, romantically. He made that clear, but I know he cares. He would have to, what with taking Josh and asking how I am all the time. No matter how hard I was to be around.

“You’re so clingy too. I don’t think you understand that you need me. Who else would put up with this? Be grateful for once.” Scott said, looking away from me.

“Scott, I’m serious. I don’t want to be with you.” I said.

He turned back to me angrily.

“Really? No wonder Josh’s dad left and Patrick refuses to be with you. You don’t see a good thing even if it hits you in the face. I love you. Who else will? Josh? Well you’re his mother so he doesn’t have much of option. Don’t say anything else.” He said, glaring at me.

I didn’t say anything back; in fact I didn’t say anything at all. When he left, I just half smiled at him and then he kissed me and walked out.

I texted Patrick that he could bring Josh back. I really think I was going to ask Patrick to stop taking him. I like that Josh is far away from Scott, but it was a lot to ask from him. He was probably feeling the same way too.

I pulled my knees to my chest. I really didn’t know how to get out this stupid relationship. Maybe my best way was to do at work, where I know he can’t hurt me. I can sit down and really talk to him about how stupid this relationship is. What was I doing to benefit him?

I didn’t feel sad anymore. That was something that made me happy to admit. I felt worn out though. I was tired of spinning in the same old circles, beyond Scott.

I sighed just before a knock on my door. I got up and let Patrick and Josh in. Patrick was holding him because he was half asleep. I moved out of the way so Patrick could put him in his bed. Patrick smiled at me and walked to Josh’s room. I came in behind him and lifted up josh’s blanket. Patrick laid him down. He stepped back when Josh opened his eyes so I could tell him goodnight. 

I kissed his forehead and pushed back his hair a little bit.

“I love you honey.” I told him.

“I love you too mommy.” He said.

I took off his glasses and Patrick and I left quietly.

“Was he good for you?” I asked Patrick.

Patrick smiled and nodded.

“We finished a 1000 piece puzzle today.” Patrick said, smiling like he was proud.

“That’s good.” I said.

“Do you mind if I stay awhile?” Patrick asked.

“Not at all, I actually have something I kind of want to talk about.” I said, apprehensively.

“What?” Patrick said, his hand running through his hair.

“You don’t have to take Josh, really. It’s really too much trouble for you.” I said. He frowned.

“Carol, I don’t mind.” He said.

“You could be doing other things than spending time with Josh. You probably want to do other things.” I said. I didn’t know what to do with my hands so I just kind of crossed them, but I ended up sort of hugging myself.

Patrick looked at me, his eyes soft.

“Carol I want to do this. I want to be there for the both of you.” Patrick said in a whisper.

“If Scott wasn’t around, would you have still said that?” I found myself saying.

I hated myself as the words came out. They came out of nowhere. Patrick didn’t look mad. He just seemed lost for words, both of us couldn’t think of anything to say.

“Patrick, I know that was uncalled for. Sorry.” I said, looking at the ground.

“You’re right for calling me out.” He said.

“It’s just… it seems like if you hadn’t found out about Scott, you wouldn’t be as involved.” I said.

I felt him look at me.

“Would you believe if I said it was bad timing?” He said softly.

“Well, I don’t know. We were sort of talking again, and then you just came in to help Faith and then you saw Scott and you just kind of made an entrance.” I said.

“God I’m an asshole.” He said.

He sighed. I looked up at him. He looked almost upset.

“Patrick, I understand. I really am grateful for you being here.” I said, trying to make him okay. I didn’t want him to feel bad.

“Carol, my relationship was slowly fading and maybe Scott sped things up. I made a huge fucking mistake because I’m a selfish asshole.” He said, angrily.

I stared at him.

“Patrick you don’t have to be so hard on yourself. You just saw a problem with your friend, me, and you helped. That’s not selfish.” I said, trying to get him to stop being angry at himself.

His eyes met mine.

“I’m not just talking about you and Scott.” He said.

It clicked in my brain. He was talking about Faith.

“Oh, Patrick, we already talked about this. You’re fine.” I said.

“No I’m not. If I could go back in time that’s one of the things I would change.” He said.

“Pat, you had fun with that relationship, so don’t regret it.” I said.

“I do regret it though. I didn’t think, I never think.” Patrick said, looking down.

I touched his shoulder so he would look up at me. When he did I smiled a little.

“Hey, just because you two ended badly doesn’t mean you were the only one responsible. She is also at fault.” I told him.

“Carol, I don’t think you understand what I’m trying to say here.” He said.

“What?” I asked, blinking at him.

“I regret my relationship with Faith, because it ruined things with you. I’m selfish because I didn’t think you had enough time for me. I’m an asshole because I promised you so much and then backed out, and then I seemed to only come back because you’re in a bad relationship.” Patrick said, slowly.

“It’s okay,” I said smiling a little, “It didn’t ruin anything, I’m over it. I understand that it would seem like I didn’t have time for you, I could have made more of an effort. It’s okay.”

“It’s really bad timing.” He said, not looking away from me.

“I don’t care that if Scott was the one to make you realize this. If wasn’t him, it would have been something else.” I said.

He looked down.

“It’s just cheap of me, to tell you all this because of Scott.” He whispered.

“Like you said, maybe he just sped things up.” I said.

“So when you’re relationship with Scott is over and you really feel ready, and I don’t decide to be an asshole…” He said, looking at me for a response.

I smiled, which made him smile. I felt butterflies, even though I wasn’t in the happiest of moods because of Scott. I did exactly what he told me I’d do, I ran straight to Patrick.

“I would love a date or something…” I said.

Patrick pulled me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around him. I don’t think he knew how much he was comforting me. Scott’s words were floating in head with all this talk of a relationship with Patrick.  I didn’t want Patrick to have to deal with me if I am what Scott says.

“I’m going to make it up to you.” Patrick whispered.

“It’s fine Patrick. You don’t have to make anything up to me.” I said back.

“But I will.” He said.

He hugged me tighter and I laughed. He released me.

**********************************************************

Patrick

I didn’t deserve her. She should hate me or at the very least be angry. But no, she forgave me.

She smiled at me again. Despite the smile, she looked stressed. The smile didn’t quite reach her eyes like normal and she had bags under her eyes.

“How did things go with Scott today?” I asked.

“Fine.” She said her smile fading.

“What happened?” I asked softly.

I prepared for her to say the worst. I didn’t see a bruise or a mark on her. I didn’t want her to be in a pain.

“Nothing really. I tried to break up with him and he wouldn’t listen.” She said, hugging herself. I don’t think she realized she did this when she was anxious.

I extended my hand and she took it. I walked her over to her couch where we sat down.

“Did he say anything?” I asked.

“He just said that I was a lot to deal with, and that I should be lucky because he loves me and no one else will. I tried to reason with him. I said he still had his other girlfriend-”

“What?” I asked angrily. Another girlfriend? There was a knot in my stomach.

“I didn’t tell you about that for a reason,” She said frowning, “I didn’t mean to make you mad.”

“Carol, you’re not the one who is making me mad. How could he have another girlfriend? How could he do all this to you?” I asked.

“I don’t know.” She said, exasperated.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, “Don’t believe a word he says about you. A lot of people love you.”

She half smiled.

“I don’t think he means it most of the time. He just says thing to put me down.” She said, like it was a reasonable fact.

“Does he always say stuff like that?” I asked.

“No not really. Most of the time he doesn’t say or do much.” Carol said shrugging.

“That’s good.” I said.

I leaned back so that Carol and I were shoulder to shoulder. She smiled. I grabbed her hand and laced my fingers with hers. Her hands were cold and soft. I couldn’t help but smile when she leaned her head on my shoulder.

“I still want to take Josh.” I said.

“You really don’t have too.” She said.

“I enjoy spending time with him. He is a great kid. I think he could become an evil genius.” I said.

Carol laughed.

“I’m serious though. I want you to be there too.” I said.

“I know that it means so much to him that you’re spending time with him.  Hopefully soon I’ll be able to join you. I just don’t want you to feel obligated to take him.” She said.

“I like being a father figure to him. I just feel bad because these last few months I wasn’t here that much.” I said.

“You don’t have to feel bad.” Carol said, “Along with you he has Jim, John, Nick, and Tom. Nick is determined to get him to like baseball.”

“I could see Josh playing baseball.” I said.

“He could be, but I’m scared of him having an asthma attack.” Carol said.

“Has he had one recently?” I asked.

“He had one about two weeks ago. It wasn’t that bad.” She said.

It suddenly hit me how tired I was, but I didn’t want to leave.

**********************************************************

Carol

I was walking to my desk. Nick, Jim, and John were already at theirs, drinking some coffee before the day started. They had my cup of coffee sitting on my desk like normal. Jim’s has a philosophy that the more coffee we drink, the faster we’ll solve a case. I didn’t doubt that because I would crash around 1:00 without any coffee.

I smiled at them as I got to my desk.

“Good morning.” I said, setting some files on my desk that I brought home with me.

“Morning Carol.” John said happily.

“It’s not a good morning.” Nick said.

“Grumpy much?” I asked, looking at him.

“I would be, but there’s a rumor going around.” Nick said, holding a stare.

I had my poker face on, but I was so surprised that it might be showing. How could anyone find out about me and Patrick? I mean we just agreed that when this whole thing with Scott was over we’ll try a relationship. We hugged and held hands. Scott was going to flip if he found out about Patrick. It’s not like I’m cheating on him. He’s the one actually cheating!

“About what?” I asked, before I took a sip of coffee.

“John have you heard the rumor also?” Nick asked, turning his chair towards him.

“I have, yes.” He said, stiffening.

Jim crossed his arms.

“What’s the rumor?” I asked, looking at all three of them.

“That you are dating Scott again.” Nick said quietly.

I sat down and didn’t look at them. I was angry that people knew, especially them. I didn’t want to disappoint them.

“Carol, why didn’t you tell us?” John asked.

Jim reached over and put his hand on my shoulder. I half smiled.

“I was forced into it. I am trying to leave.” I said.

“How did he force?” Nick asked, his eyes softened.

“How do you think?” I said.

“We’re not going to let this go on.” Jim said.

“What about Josh?” Nick asked.

“When Scott’s around Patrick takes him.” I said.

“So Patrick knows?” Nick said.

I nodded.

“Thank god for Patrick.” John said.

“Carol if you need anything from us, don’t hesitate to ask. We want to help and be there for you.” Jim said.

“No one is going to push you around while we are living.” John said.

I nodded.

“Thanks guys.” I said, smiling at all of them.

“Why did tell Patrick before us?” Nick asked, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms.

“He was just at the right place at the right time.” I said.

“You let him babysit Josh though. I’m his godfather.” Nick said sternly.

“Nick if you really honestly want to take Josh or spend a weekend with him, all you have to do is ask.” I said.

“We should take him to a baseball field before it gets to cold.” John said to Nick.

“Yes we should. Can we borrow him for a day?” Nick asked with a smile.

“I’m okay with it. I’ll talk to him tonight.” I said.

“Okay. We love you Carol.” Nick said.

“I love you guys too.” I said, shaking my head.

 

 

Chapter 33

Patrick

I went over to Carol’s right after work. Josh opened the door for me when I knocked. He broke into a huge smile.

“Hello Patrick.” He said.

“Hey buddy.” I said.

Carol was in her kitchen. She still had her work clothes on, gun and badge included. She waved at me with a smile.

Josh walked to Carol.

“So can I go?” He asked, grabbing her hand.

“Maybe.” Carol said, teasing him.

“Where does he want to go?” I asked joining them.

“He wants to go on a field trip with his class.” Carol said.

“To where?” I asked.

“The science museum.” Carol said.

“Oh Josh, that’s asking a lot.” I said, adding to Carol’s teasing.

“It’s just a museum.” Josh looking at us like we were crazy.

Carol sighed.

“I guess you can go…” She said.

“Thank you mommy!” He said.

“You’re welcome.” She said, ruffling his hair.

He went into the living to play with his building blocks.

“He looked so upset.” I said, smiling.

“He probably would have been if I kept it going longer.” She said.

I nodded.

“How was your day?” Carol asked, her eyes meeting mine.

“Okay. Quentin and Reed had a thrilling argument over who is the greatest superhero is. Quentin seems so smitten by Bella he refuses to talk to her.” I said, shrugging.

“Quentin needs to open up more. It’s not like he’s a bad person. He’s so nice, cute, and dorky.  He must really like Bella.” Carol said.

“Did you just say Quentin was cute? He will freak out if I told him that.” I said.

“Why?” Carol asked, laughing.

“He’s terrified of you.” I said.

“Me?” Carol said, turning her whole body towards me.

“You’re very intimidating.” I said.

“Intimidating? Me? How?” She asked.

“Well... you’re very beautiful so there’s the first thing.” I said.

She rolled her eyes.

“I’m sorry I had too.” I said.

“Thanks.” She said.

I grabbed her hand.

“So how was your day?” I asked.

“Fine.” She said, lacing her fingers with mine, “Nick, Jim, and John found out about Scott.”

“They didn’t know?” I asked.

“No.”

“Well it’s good they know.” I said.

“Why?” She asked.

“More support.” I said.

She shrugged.

“Are you staying for dinner?” Carol asked.

“Sure. Are you going to teach me something new or am I going to make awesome pancakes again?” I asked.

“How are you with tacos?” She asked.

“I actually know how to make tacos.” I said, proud.

“Great. Now we just need to teach Josh.” She said.

***

The tacos came out amazingly. Josh made the perfect tacos.  But with that being said, his fell apart. He was so disappointed.

Josh was reading us a book. He was doing a great job of reading out loud. He did a great job when people talked. He would give each character a different voice. II know Carol had taught him that.

He was sitting on Carol’s lap, with his head resting on her shoulder. I was sitting right next to her, holding her hand and listening to Josh. I liked that Carol did this with him every day. She seemed so happy, she was happy. I was happy too.

Josh finished the chapter in his book. He put the book mark in and set it aside.

“Patrick are you going to be here every day?” Josh asked looking at me.

“I’m going to be here as often as I can.” I said.

He smiled.

Carol’s phone went off. She read the screen and stiffened.

“What?” I asked, watching her.

She handed me her phone.

On the screen was a text from Scott.

I’m going to be at your apartment in about 10 minutes.

I handed it back to her.

“I’ll take him to my apartment.” I said.

I didn’t want to leave, but I knew was I going to. I wasn’t going to let Scott hurt Josh, and I didn’t want him to hurt Carol either.

“Come with me.” I said.

She looked at me.

“He can’t do anything if you’re not home.” I said.

She sighed.

“I’m just going to face him.” She said, “Josh do you want to go with Patrick for a little bit. To see Tom and aunt Hannah?”

“Yeah.” He said.

He got off of her and we both stood up.

“Take your book, okay?” Carol said, getting on her knees so she was eye level with him, “Be good.”

“I will.”

She hugged him.

“I love you honey.” She said.

“I love you too.” He said.

“Carol, please come with us.” I said.

She got up.

“It’s okay, really Patrick.” She said, touching my arm.

I didn’t want to leave without her. I hugged her.

“Please.” I said.

She squeezed me slightly.

“It’ll be okay. Just take care of him please.” She said.

“I want you text me every so often so I know you’re okay.” I said, looking at her.

“I will.”

**********************************************************

Carol

I got the knot in my stomach. The second Josh and Patrick left, it loosened slightly, but nonetheless it was still there. Patrick looked down right freaked out. It was probably nothing, but he knew that it could be something.

I sat and waited for him. I watched the news, but only lasted for a few minutes when there was a knock. A loud knock. I closed my eyes. Everything was going to be okay.

I opened the door and smiled at a very pissed Scott. I shut the door.

“Why did you tell them?” He yelled.

“Tell who what?” I asked calmly.

He stepped right in front of me. He was only inches away from me.

“Why did you tell Nick that I hurt you?” He asked.

I hesitated.

“Because you have.” I said, deciding to tell the truth.

“You have no idea what hurt is.” Scott said.

I didn’t say anything back. I was losing my nerve.

“What did you want to accomplish with telling someone?” He demanded.

“I want to leave you.” I said.

I searing pain erupted in my face. It took me a second to realize that he slapped me. I took a step back. I looked up at him just in time to see him grab my shirt and pulled me toward him.

“Did you want to get me arrested?” He snarled.

He didn’t give me five seconds to answer before he slammed me into a wall. Pain erupted in my back and the base of my skull. He held me on the wall.

“Did you think someone would come and save you?” He yelled.

“Scott please stop.” I whispered, tear running down my cheeks.

I tried to get out of his grasp but he slammed me back making the pain worse. There were stars in my vision and my head was spinning.

“Who else did you tell?” He growled.

I didn’t answer. He threw me down to the floor.

“Who else did you tell?” He said louder.

“No one.” I gasped.

He kicked hard. I curled up into a ball. I felt the sting radiate through my ribs. I closed my eyes trying to get the thoughts scrambling around in my head together. I felt him push one of shoulders so I was flat on my back. I felt him get on top of me. I tried to hit his arms away or scratch him. I needed to get this over with.

He brought his fist down hard on my chest. It knocked the air out of me. I had to grasp for breath. He punched the side of my head.

I closed my eyes. I felt his hands go around my neck. It was so hard to breathe. I felt dizzy. Suddenly the hands were gone. I just closed my eyes.

I felt hands again on my arm and then on my face.

**********************************************************

Patrick

I dropped Josh off with Hannah and Tom. I got back to my car and I tried to call Carol. She didn’t answer. I was so worried and I don’t know why. I’ve never felt like this before. I felt sick.

I didn’t know what to do. I freaking out. I was having a full blown panic attack. I tried to just breathe to calm myself down.

Carol had said anything for about 20 minutes. I couldn’t stand it anymore.

I just opened my phone and called John.

“Hey Patrick what’s up?” He said, happily.

“Uh John, you know about Scott right?” I asked, quickly.

“Yes, I do.” He said solemnly.

I described the situation to him.

“Okay, I’m going to Carol’s right now.” He said urgently.

“Me too.” I said, gasped.

The next thing I knew we were walking down Carol’s hall. I could hear a commotion before we even got to her door. John walked up to her door to see if it was unlocked. It turned and John opened the door.

Scott was on top of Carol, his hands around her throat. John reacted quickly. He pulled Scott off of her. I ran right to Carol on the ground, not hearing or seeing what was happening around us.

I felt tears sting my eyes. She was breathing slowly. I touched her face, one side was hot to the touch and red. There were tears running down her cheeks.

“Carol.” I said my voice shaking.

Her eyes opened a bit. I tried to smile and at her, but it failed.

“It’s going to be okay.” I whispered as I touched the cheek that wasn’t inflamed.

“I’m okay.” She whispered.

“Carol you’re hurt badly.” I said, relieved to hear her voice.

She closed her eyes. I grabbed one of her hands.

I looked up to two police officers taking Scott out of the apartment. There was another officer with John. The paramedics came in. They checked her out to see if she needed to go to the hospital.

They determined that she didn’t need to go. They left and we all gave a statement to the police officer. He called Carol Detective Rince or ma’am. Him, Carol, and John seemed to work together nicely.

“Are you going to press charges?” The officer asked her.

Carol sighed.

“I’m not sure yet.” She said.

“Okay. I’m going to inform both of your captains. You might be on leave while the investigation is going.” He said.

Carol nodded. The officer and her shake hands.

When he was gone John spoke.

“Are you really okay?” He asked Carol.

“Yeah, a little sore but I’ll live.” She said.

He hugged her.

“I’ll tell the guys tomorrow.” He said.

“Okay, I’ll probably be there in the morning.” She said.

He nodded.

He hugged me too.

“You take good care if her, okay?” He said.

I smiled.

“I’ll do my best.”

John smiled.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said to Carol.

“Bye.” She said.

When he left she turned to me.

“I’m sorry Patrick.” She said.

“It’s not your fault.” I said.

“I should have gone with you.” She said.

“Carol don’t blame yourself.” I said.

“Then who do I blame?” She asked.

“Scott.” I said.

She sighed. She took a step towards me and I opened my arms. She came into them. I was gentle with hugging her. I didn’t want to hurt her.

“It’s all over now.” I whispered.

She nodded. I pulled her closer. This was all over. Scott wouldn’t hurt her anymore. She was free from him. She didn’t have to worry about Josh getting hurt anymore. She didn’t have to worry about herself getting hurt. Carol was going to be happy.